The Specialer

[RIKA]

After reading the Dark Energy thread something from the past really bothered me. I wanted to have a separate thread so the thought wouldn't get lost.

A true story from my past.

When I was 10 years old we had a "gang" or group of kids ranging from 9yrs to 11 yrs. There was another child named Ted who was 10yrs. Ted was fat, obnoxious, bossy and a tattle-tale. The type who would take his bat and ball and run home crying to mommy if he didn't get his way.

Well, we decided that we didn't want Ted as part of our group. We made up a nickname for him; we called him 'Special Spit' or the 'Specialer' for short and we shut him out. Every time he came around we would run from him and call him that nasty name. Well, he retaliated by trying to spit on us which made him even more unpopular. We closed the door on him totally and completely. Time passed and we grew up. Eventually he was tolerated to a degree but was never accepted as part of the group.

I wonder what would have happened if we had accepted him. Would he have changed? I can see now that he became so desperate for attention that he would do anything just to get noticed - even if that notice was negative.

I know that we are adults now but wonder if, in some small way, Gunkid hasn't become our "Specialer'. He is arrogant, nasty and verbally abusive but thrives on attention - even negative attention.

Well, this is my pensive moment. I wonder we can come up with some new and creative alternate way to influence Gunkid's behavior. Negative reinforcement hasn't worked and ignoring him hasn't worked.

I have no answers. Do you? Any suggestions on how to replace Dark Energy with Light Energy?

RIKA

[Wylycoyte]

So he was obnoxious and bossy and showed numerous antisocial behaviors whenever he could get away with it...why do you think tolerating him would do anything other than allow him a chance to further act like an ass?

The switch they have to flip is internal. If they're not willing to do that, then marginalization and ostracism will have to do. That's just my opinion, of course.

[Magnum88C]

The whole "accept him" and "positive reinforcement" was tried years and years ago. He rejected it. IF you didn't not only let him have his way, but also agree with and approve of (sort of like the militant gay groups) everything he said, he started the name-calling, death threats, etc.

So, I don't have any sad feelings over the way he's treated. Everytime someone new sees him they try the "make nicee-nicee" with him and he rejects it, you've seen this several times. So, **** him, it's up to him to show US he's changing.
Hell, his ego is too big, he's got too much invested in the asshole persona to do that.
But then again, he can just stop posting under those names, make a new one and act like a human, and noone has to know who he is. But he won't do that either. . .so. . .it's his problem.