Ve haf come by zum intelligence today concerning a conspiracy you all must be avare of.
A dozen subversive water bottle were taken in for interrogation and reeducation today. Seems the capitalist swine have become too lazy to refill themselves, and ve had to find out vhere dis recalitrance vas picked up from. No information was divulged directly from the interrogations, so the insurrectionist bottles were force fed water until they could hold no more. They were then lined up to be properly shot as enemas of the state.
This is vhere ve found ze conspiracy. Apparently ze vater bottles vere in cahoots vid de flying soda bottle confederacy. Ve had to hit the ground as our sophisticated .45 caliber AA guns shot down ze flying soda can commando teams zat arrived to rescue their insurrectionist co-conspirators.
Ve of course gave ze vater bottles a proper firing squad. One 7.62x54mm 203-gr bullet per traitor. Perhaps ze next batch of vater bottles vill be more diligent in there filling duties.
A dozen subversive water bottle were taken in for interrogation and reeducation today. Seems the capitalist swine have become too lazy to refill themselves, and ve had to find out vhere dis recalitrance vas picked up from. No information was divulged directly from the interrogations, so the insurrectionist bottles were force fed water until they could hold no more. They were then lined up to be properly shot as enemas of the state.
This is vhere ve found ze conspiracy. Apparently ze vater bottles vere in cahoots vid de flying soda bottle confederacy. Ve had to hit the ground as our sophisticated .45 caliber AA guns shot down ze flying soda can commando teams zat arrived to rescue their insurrectionist co-conspirators.
Ve of course gave ze vater bottles a proper firing squad. One 7.62x54mm 203-gr bullet per traitor. Perhaps ze next batch of vater bottles vill be more diligent in there filling duties.
