[kenster]

A well-known Cardiologist died and was given an elaborate funeral,
with many of his fellow MDs in attendance. A huge heart covered in
flowers stood behind the casket during the service.

Following the eulogy, the heart opened, and the casket rolled inside. The heart then closed, sealing the doctor in the beautiful heart forever.

Suddenly, one of the mourners burst into laughter. When confronted, he said, "I'm sorry, I was just thinking of my own funeral -- I'm a Gynecologist!"

At that point, the Proctologist fainted...

 

[Rob Hill/Geckos Anonymous]

Like a giant suppository entering a flowered rectum, so are the Days of Our Lives.

That's TWO good jokes Ken, keep it up

 

[Pondoris]

Tacky Cajun Funeral

Cajun Funeral

One day, while fishing under the I-10 bridge in The Atchafalaya Basin, Boudreaux made his confession. "We all been friend for tirty years and been tru a lot. I never told ya'll dis before because I didn't wanna ruin our friendship, but I'm gay."

Fontenot looked over at Thibodeaux and said, "We kinda figured dat out a while back, but wadn't gonna say nutin' because we didn't wanna embarrass you."

Boudreaux thanked them for their understanding and continued: "Da reason I'm tollin' ya'll dis is cause I got AIDS and I got six munts to live. Ya'll da only family I got lef and I want ya'll to promise me dat ya'll won't let dem bary me. I'm scared of dem caskets and I wanna be cremated. Den, I want ya'll to trow my ashes from dat bridge up over dis here water, where we've spent so much time togeder."

Fontenot and Thibodeaux wiped back a few tears, then agreed to do what their friend had asked.

Sho'nough, six munts later Boudreaux died, and they were standing on the bridge with the ashes. Fontenot was about to trow them out when Thibodeaux stopped him: "Wait, you gotta say somtin," he said.

"I donno what to say. I never was much about goin' to church, "Fontenot admitted.

Thibodeaux, he scratch his head. "Just say somtin'...anyting. Make it ryhme."

Fontenot him, he tought about it a while and started trowin' dem ashes out over da water and said:

"Ashes to ashes,

Dust to dust,

If you liked pussy,

You'd be here wit us!!!