[kenster]

A man staggers into an emergency room with a concussion, multiple bruises, two black eyes and a five iron wrapped tightly around his throat. Naturally, the doctor asks him what happened.


"Well, it was like this", said the man. "I was having a quiet round of golf with my wife,when at a difficult hole, we both sliced our balls into a pasture of cows. We went to look for them, and while I was rooting around, I noticed one of the cows had something white at its rear end. I walked over and lifted up the tail, and sure enough, there was a golf ball with my wife's monogram on it-stuck right in the middle of the cow's butt. That's when I made my big mistake."



"What did you do?" asked the doctor.



"Well, I lifted the cow's tail and yelled to my wife, "Hey this looks like yours!" ....... I don't remember much after that."

 

[Guest]

Woman walks into the doctors office and tells the doctor "I got hit by a golf ball, and I think I need a bandage."

Doctor says "Where were you hit?"

Woman says "Between the first hole and the second hole."

Doctor says "That dosn't leave much room for the Band-Aide!"

 

[Guest]

Three guys were in the maternity ward staring at their newborn baby daughters....
The first one says, "Ya know, guys.... That's my THIRD baby girl.... one more baby girl, and I'll have a woman's bridge club!"....

The second guy says, "That's nothing.... That's my SEVENTH baby girl.... one more baby girl, and I'll have a professional woman's softball team!"....

The third guy says, "Forget that.... That's my SEVENTEENTH baby girl.... one more baby girl, and I'll have a complete GOLFCOURSE!"....

....Neil